Bob Ask's the question.. Why?

So, I'm laying around one day, doing what dog's do... (yeah I was licking myself, so what?) when it popped into my head... Why? and no not why was I licking myself, we know why I do that! But all those questions one wakes up to one day and ask's themselves..

Why isn't there cat poop flavored dog food? Seriously, for those of us who find cat poop a delicacy, if someone invented cat poop flavored dog food... I'm telling ya, you'd be rich.

Why can't I drink from the toilet? What's the big deal? The water is clean, it's cold, and it has a little added flavor. I don't scold you when you come home from a night of drinking and have your face buried deep in the toilet do I? No!

Why can't I chew up your shoes? (This one's for all the female humans out there) Your always looking for a reason to go buy a new pair anyways, well there ya go! Besides, I usually only chew on the black ones and you have like 25 pairs of black shoes, if I chew one, put it with another black one and your set for the night!

Why can't I eat the neighbors cat? You know you hate that furry little bastard as much as I do! He craps in our yard, digs up your flowers, and walks back and forth across the fence tormenting your beloved pet. Let me eat some pussy!

Why can't I hump the mailman's leg? That's just my way of saying Thank You kind Sir for delivering my humans mail.

Why do humans always blame us when they fart?

Why do humans yell at us for licking ourselves? Ya know what... You would if you could! Getoverit!